The End of The Beggining

There is a point when you realize that maybe things in your life aren't as perfect as you thought they were. For BA in London that moment came about fifteen minutes ago. On the back of three weeks of whiskey being required for sleep at night I realized I was at a low point when Neil Cavuto (of Your World with Neil Cavuto on Fox) nearly drove me to throw my lap top across the room.

I was just finishing my third drink for the evening when Cavuto had the gall to suggest that QLD's own Mohammed Asif Ali was a terrorist. Incensed I slammed my drink on the coffee table and attempted to throw my laptop at the TV. Luckily for me I am watching Fox News on my Laptop so the metaphysical impossibility of throwing something at itself saved the fate of the Dell Inspirion.

One of my favorite scenes of celluloid history is in the Ivan Rietman classic Stripes when Winger realizes he will be dead in 6 months if he continues with life as he is currently living it. Winger joins the army (with hilarious results) but I am going to try and shake things up by embarking on the Grand Tour of Europe- 2007, known on other sites as the Tour de Fear .

I've just about packed my bags (that is I have thought about what to do with my stuff) and quit the job. The bus is hired, the e-tinerary has been created, its time to venture out and leave this cold, wet, dull city in my past.

We are going to start this July with a casual jaunt around France in the HMAS: Messy Days Express, joined by long time supporter and Team Love Train Domination team mate Kapitan Kloss, and my old nemisis, the A team's Dav Rossi. July will see your favorite blogger visiting all the sites of France (the English Channel and the Cognac Distillery - we will find something to do with the rest of the month), who knows where we will end up? (if I was a better blogger I would have a Google Earth mash up showing the route). Also follow closely for a surprise visit from Le Chez who we're told is still lurking somewhere in the South of France. Who knows, maybe we will end up at a mustard or a cheese factory - Whoa, we may have to rate a few posts (AO) in the coming month.

Oh God, Cavuto is gone and has been replaced by The Big Story with John Gibson - why do I do this too myself? We've switched to the old tawny now.

So at the end of July we will drop the dead weight represented by the Kapitan and Dav Rossi (who is going home with a ring in his pocket - you heard it here first). And adventuring off along the Mediterranean Coast - the e-tinereary is less specific here, basically the entry looks like this: "August - ??". We will see what happens. The August Adventures will be worked out by a complex formula basically looking something like: how far will the money go? (if you are contacted by anyone from Barclays, Visa or American Express asking about me - pretend you don't know me) but hey- even if I only sit on a beach in Croatia for the month I will still be rocking harder then most of my winter bound constituents.

Finally the Grand Tour will find its end in the decadence dipped debacle that will be the Rugby World Cup 2007 in France. Joined by a no less luminary support crew as the Kapitan, the Ayatollah, F.U.C, Duggan (who needs a nickname), Dangerous, and others. September (and early October) promises to open the all ready wide eyes to their furtherest point yet.

The blog posts may come a little slowly over the next few months - for this I apologize, but know that it is better that I get out of Britain and the utter Fear that currently congests the streets (Seriously three machine guns on the way to work this morning - someone in the the first world beat that!). Anyways, the dream is finally coming to fruition, don't be afraid to come and visit! (some lesbian on The Big Story just said that touching is a form of sexual assault. Am I assaulting myself?)